Suddenly, I'm not in the mood. To do anything. To do whatever.
So, a good friend of mine accused me of something that's not a fact. I don't think it's true. I don't want it to be, anyway. Yet, she continues to assume. It used to be fun. We used to joke around about it and all. But the moment she put in 'seriously' in the conversation, I got pissed off. My mind was boiling up words, "you are not me and therefore you cannot always assume I feel like what you think I'm feeling".
I didn't say that, of course. Bottling up too much is my forte.
It's incredibly petty, I know. That is why I'm typing this, recording this... this whatever. I hadn't been this angry since God knows when. I just hope whatever this is would go away.
It doesn't feel good, much less does it feel right.
But, hey. I think I'm realizing the facts now. It had little to do with her accusation. It was her feeling superior, over my thoughts and my self in entirety.
I found that rude and although I hate to write like I'm writing right now (especially with her as the subject), I just had to state it in here. This is a different kind of anger. It's not that type of anger when all you want to do is kick concrete walls or listen to Emarosa.
In fact I don't think it's anger at all. I don't feel hostility but I feel the vehemence. It's deep in and is hard to define. I hate to think she feels it too. She just signed off without a goodbye.
I probably didn't state it right. I'm not exactly a master of conveying the emotions I feel and I apologize if this is rather incomplete. But I hope you did get a hint.
Because it hurts. It hurts a lot.
But more than anything, I am sorry.
So, a good friend of mine accused me of something that's not a fact. I don't think it's true. I don't want it to be, anyway. Yet, she continues to assume. It used to be fun. We used to joke around about it and all. But the moment she put in 'seriously' in the conversation, I got pissed off. My mind was boiling up words, "you are not me and therefore you cannot always assume I feel like what you think I'm feeling".
I didn't say that, of course. Bottling up too much is my forte.
It's incredibly petty, I know. That is why I'm typing this, recording this... this whatever. I hadn't been this angry since God knows when. I just hope whatever this is would go away.
It doesn't feel good, much less does it feel right.
But, hey. I think I'm realizing the facts now. It had little to do with her accusation. It was her feeling superior, over my thoughts and my self in entirety.
I found that rude and although I hate to write like I'm writing right now (especially with her as the subject), I just had to state it in here. This is a different kind of anger. It's not that type of anger when all you want to do is kick concrete walls or listen to Emarosa.
In fact I don't think it's anger at all. I don't feel hostility but I feel the vehemence. It's deep in and is hard to define. I hate to think she feels it too. She just signed off without a goodbye.
I probably didn't state it right. I'm not exactly a master of conveying the emotions I feel and I apologize if this is rather incomplete. But I hope you did get a hint.
Because it hurts. It hurts a lot.
But more than anything, I am sorry.
