I hate insolence. I hate it even more when I'm sunken. Now my mind's completely off because somebody was scintillating with pride while my left eyelid's still swollen from last night. It's the Gleemeter; I'm sulking at the bottom and she's rocketing up, up, up to immeasurable heights of happiness. I think this rendered good conversation impossible. Bad chemistry is bad chemistry. I swore to invisibility for the rest of this day. The same goes for any other communication medium. I don't want to talk to anybody.
I know she'd rub it in that she's winning this life game and I'm losing badly because of my light-headed friends and my general incapabilities. I wouldn't wait for her to indirectly attack me with my own predictions. I'm not as shallow as she might think. God damn her. Why did HEARTLESS PLANNER DUDE put the likes of her into my life anyway? I wish he never did. She makes me growl when I'm alone, out of sheer annoyance, and I'm sick of it.
I wish I could tell her this. I wish I could tell anybody this. It just feels like a felony, sometimes, when I tell people I'm down. I don't want them to think I'm turning to them for help. No, no. Even if people say they're going to be there when I'm in need (like the most adorable friendship cliché), I don't turn to them. It's not because I doubt them; it's just because I don't want to be a burden, which I know I will be when I initiate my whining process, be it through the phone, through messenger, or through actual contact. I'd rather have people dumping on me than me dumping on people. It's less of a drag. That's why I don't tell people much about the nitty-gritty of my life. What can my life possibly be to those people concerned, anyway?
That is all for this weekend. Wish my Gleemeter shoots up, and yours too. I still feel bad and I haven't talked to anybody outside the house but it will pass soon. I think my new theme is awesome, btw.
I know she'd rub it in that she's winning this life game and I'm losing badly because of my light-headed friends and my general incapabilities. I wouldn't wait for her to indirectly attack me with my own predictions. I'm not as shallow as she might think. God damn her. Why did HEARTLESS PLANNER DUDE put the likes of her into my life anyway? I wish he never did. She makes me growl when I'm alone, out of sheer annoyance, and I'm sick of it.
I wish I could tell her this. I wish I could tell anybody this. It just feels like a felony, sometimes, when I tell people I'm down. I don't want them to think I'm turning to them for help. No, no. Even if people say they're going to be there when I'm in need (like the most adorable friendship cliché), I don't turn to them. It's not because I doubt them; it's just because I don't want to be a burden, which I know I will be when I initiate my whining process, be it through the phone, through messenger, or through actual contact. I'd rather have people dumping on me than me dumping on people. It's less of a drag. That's why I don't tell people much about the nitty-gritty of my life. What can my life possibly be to those people concerned, anyway?
That is all for this weekend. Wish my Gleemeter shoots up, and yours too. I still feel bad and I haven't talked to anybody outside the house but it will pass soon. I think my new theme is awesome, btw.
